The Screaming Mute

I wrote the beginning of this when I was going through a major depression in 2012 circa March. I picked up and finished it during a couple spouts of rage and while in my last relationship. Emotions work in mysterious ways. The human mind can be a rather complex thing, here represents my rage and pain within the year 2012.

They say you have options in life,

You know they are lying to make you feel at ease,

Always feeling like you can never please,

Such a fool,

Everyone being so fucking cruel.

No time to think properly,

Always acting so awkwardly,

No one by your side,

Feeling forced to hide,

People down your throat,

Wishing that some how you can just choke.

Death seems like your friend,

“Its all in your head”

It’s hard to understand,

Even I cannot comprehend

Why must I be burdened with this disturbed mind?

Thinking this way makes like so hard,

Never any time to relax,

Always feeling like an ass,

Friends are burdensome these days,

Telling you to stop hurting saying youre in some sort of haze.

You just want out, having urges to end it all.

Cant because they’ll just freak, make you want to leave without any set priorities,

Hiding, concealing, leading a secluded life,

Feeling like a slave in this fucked up constitution,

Things seem so dull in a mind so bleak,

This loveless heart makes you feel like a freak.

Being labeled as something your’e not,

Makes THEM feel like some sort of god,

Being  dreamer is unheard of,

Close-minded individuals are factors of life today.

I’ve just had enough,

My spirit is to stay, nothing is okay

People judging, always harming,

Your’e nothing, just some worthless fragment of imaginary works.

Parents being over protective, quite alarming,

Being nice only for perks,

Why the hell do I even try?

Nothing is ever good enough,

Always watching the ones you harm cry,

Abusing that ole’ quote “Being a teen is tough”,

Doing the best I can,

Nothing ever flies,

Wishing one day I can live up to some shitty standard?

What’s the point? It still won’t make anything better, ALL some fucked up lies.

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